Pyrotechnic Nabobs of the Night!


Every Fourth of July, for years now, I’ve suffered from a particular form of insomnia. While there is no scientific name for the condition, I like the term ‘Crackeritis’. The symptoms begin around sundown and go far into the night. This being due to one or more intelligence handicapped individuals who persevere with their explosive celebrations well into the wee hours of the night.
After all the other neighbors have brought their pyrotechnic celebration to a booming end somewhere around 10PM, these mental midgets continue onwards with a boom here and a bang there. They remind me a lot of an old man with an enlarged prostate trying to empty his bladder one dribble at a time.
Lying there in bed, I’ve formed a mental picture of what these specimens of humanity must be like were I to meet one face to face. For starters, they must be very young, that’s a gimme. And, I would bet they may drink to excess since they have absolutely no sense of time. The kind of people who have very little regard for their fellow man and if asked what the Fourth was all about would only utter ‘Whuut’? (Deep thinkers and followers of history)? Not on your life! Oh, and women, you can forget about that for these guys. No girl in her right mind would put up with a stooge like that.
So, what does that leave us with? I give you a young, acne riddled, alcoholic retard who is also a social recluse that hides out in his bedroom while everyone else is out working for a living. More than likely, the money he spent on his fireworks came from his unemployment check which also irks me no end. A man whose only real talent lies in his unswerving ability to annoy others.
In other words, I’ll just bet you he’s a Democrat!
Advertisements

About forsythkid

I am just a simple man with a head full of sand who is currently residing in a small town called Forsyth Missouri. I enjoy hiking, camping and all things related to gardening. I rec’d my degree from SIU majoring in Biology many moons ago and still maintain a great interest in the study of all living things. My hobbies include meteorology, the Finnish language and inhabiting cyberspace whenever possible.
This entry was posted in Danomanno, Democratic profile, Forsythkid, Late night fireworks, vitriolic humor. Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s